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A True Hero

Re: A True Hero

Wow,that's really good :).

Or maybe, when he sees the little boy jumping, he screams:
"Ah!Balverine!Kill it!", and now he has a fear of...jumping?

Wow, I'm pretty amazing at this whole "writing" business ^_^

Still, nice story, except just try to make it a little easier to see when he's thinking or talking. Maybe go one line down when he's thinking.

Good though :D