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Australia keeps trying to kill us.

Arseface

Look at me still talking when theres science to do
Premium
Dec 28, 2006
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Melbourne
Seriously, the last three years have been pretty bad as far as natural disasters in Australia go. In February 2009, Victoria experienced the Black Saturday bushfires, where 173 people lost their lives, and over three and a half thousand homes and workplaces were destroyed. Damages were estimated at around one billion dollars.

Over the 2010/2011 New Years period, Tropical Cyclone Tasha caused Queensland to undergo serious flooding. 35 people were confirmed dead, with 9 missing. The direct damage costs are estimated to be over one billion dollars, and because a lot of our food is grown in Queensland, the economic impact is estimated to be in excess of $10 billion.

Now, as Queensland is just starting to recover from the floods, Tropical Cyclone Yasi has formed. The whole of Cyclone Tracy, which hit Darwin on Christmas in 1974 and killed 71 people, would fit neatly within Cyclone Yasi's eye. It's even bigger than Katrina. Winds of up to 300 kilometres per hour are expected, and the power has already been shut off in Townsville. To make matters worse, it's expected to hit some of Australia's most popular tourist destinations. Several urban centres with a combined population of around 360 thousand people. Luckily, we've had a fair warning and the vast majority of people are likely to be fine, but the estimated cost in terms of direct damage, and economic damage is incalculable. And that's not even counting the resulting floods.

Seriously, I'm not saying in Australia any longer than I have to.
 
Seems to me that if you want to die, you can just go to Australia and let nature take over. I just watched a natural history programme and it was saying how the temperature in some areas increases by 5 degrees every hour until it's 70 degrees centigrade on the ground and kangaroos start dying. Then it went on about dust storms, tropical storms, fires and flooding for about an hour. Right at the end there was an advert to work and live in Australia for three years. Probably not one of their better marketing campaigns, I should think...

Funny thing is, I still want to go and visit one day. Maybe it's the ancestry of convicts in my DNA trying to lure me there?
 
Seems to me that if you want to die, you can just go to Australia and let nature take over. I just watched a natural history programme and it was saying how the temperature in some areas increases by 5 degrees every hour until it's 70 degrees centigrade on the ground and kangaroos start dying. Then it went on about dust storms, tropical storms, fires and flooding for about an hour. Right at the end there was an advert to work and live in Australia for three years. Probably not one of their better marketing campaigns, I should think...

Funny thing is, I still want to go and visit one day. Maybe it's the ancestry of convicts in my DNA trying to lure me there?

Yeah, the fires are usually the most intense thing here, but this year the floods have really upped their game.

Also: Our country is so tough, that several of our native species of tree actually use bushfires to reproduce.

I totally want to visit Britain one day! We could swap. Steve wouldn't notice if his wife suddenly turned into an overweight male with an Australian accent, would he?

I was also just reminded of this song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YcdxP6m0EWk
 
consider that right now we're in a la niña period. when the warm waters shift back things should be a bit less dry for you guys.

but yea, with that said i'd wanna get out too if i were you. that's just way too much catastrophe.
 
That's what the programme said (about the bushfires) - it's just scary to consider living somewhere like that when you live in a country that just has irritable badgers, a poorly-administrated welfare system and the odd tornado in Birmingham (which no one cares about anyway). Hardly the most terrifying place on earth...
 
consider that right now we're in a la niña period. when the warm waters shift back things should be a bit less dry for you guys.

but yea, with that said i'd wanna get out too if i were you. that's just way too much catastrophe.

I've heard that weather pattern be described as "extreme normal" on the nooz. Kinda an oxymoron.

But yeah, if it's not droughts it's floods.

That's what the programme said (about the bushfires) - it's just scary to consider living somewhere like that when you live in a country that just has irritable badgers, a poorly-administrated welfare system and the odd tornado in Birmingham (which no one cares about anyway). Hardly the most terrifying place on earth...

You just reminded me of the Honey Badger.
 
And then there's the fact that pretty much any animal and plant in Australia will kill you if they get the chance. Whoever came up with the idea to ship all their convicts to said country was an evil mastermind of epic proportions.

How the hell did they manage to survive?!
 
Especially considering we were basically at war with the natives for several decades.
 
Yet you survived. Fought the natives, the animals and the environment and prevailed. As I believer in survival of the fittest and evolution, I have reached the conclusion that the surviving Aussies of today must be super human.
 
Or it could be that they don't really exist......? We all know Australia is a made-up magical land with anti-gravity boots and unicorns that eat your face...
 
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We can survive almost any environment. Sure, most of us don't know how to use simple tools, like using a stick to get ants from their nest, but that's not important.

It's kind of like reverse evolution.

And if you needed proof: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2wLi_PaYpo0

That kind of **** is... embarrassingly common.
 
Kinda makes Me glad I live in England, people complain about the weather here but to be honest it's ideal. Yeah it rains a lot, but it's good for agriculture and We don't suffer any major natural disasters. That and there are very few dangerous animals (snakes, insects etc.)

One thing I've always noticed about Brits moving to Australia is that they always return seem to again homesick only to move back over there again a year later (I know a family that has done this 4 times.)
 
But places that get a lot of natural disasters are really good at disaster-proofing their buildings. We usually don't get huge floods or bushfires on the scale of Black Saturday, so we're really unprepared.

It's like the weather is deliberately trying to trick us.