Girl problems, come read! :D
- Thread starter Lenop
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Necromancer
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From the way you talk about her, it seems like more of a romantic interest than a platonic one. Because of that, I'd like to ask two questions before I give any advice:
1. It seems to me that there are two options for how you might feel about her. You might like her in a romantic way but are wanting to settle for a platonic friendship instead because of your personal rules you've referenced. Also, you could just truly want her as a platonic friend and aren't just settling for that. So, my first question is, which is it?
2. I'm very curious, what are these rules that dictate your involvement with women, and how would dating this girl break six of them?
1. It seems to me that there are two options for how you might feel about her. You might like her in a romantic way but are wanting to settle for a platonic friendship instead because of your personal rules you've referenced. Also, you could just truly want her as a platonic friend and aren't just settling for that. So, my first question is, which is it?
2. I'm very curious, what are these rules that dictate your involvement with women, and how would dating this girl break six of them?
Gikoku
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Don't do letters, that's doing way too much just to be a simple friend. And the messenger routine via her friends/co-workers can make it seem like you have a crush on her. Your best bet is to not end up making it more difficult than what it actually is (makes things awkward), because it really doesn't take much to be friends with a nice person. Keep it simple, when you're regularly at the counter buying something ask her how business or how her day's been going, try a friendly topic of daily events for example. Easier if you can do it on a non-bustling day. Treat her like any other good friend you've met and nothing else, and you'll have little to worry about. There's no need for her to know you want to be her friend, because she'll pick up on it the more you socialize with her and it'll happen naturally.
'Course, if she's a lesbian you have absolutely nothing to worry about.
'Course, if she's a lesbian you have absolutely nothing to worry about.
Hermit
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I will tell you
you must first enter into a flirting friendship, using influences from puff the magic dragon's how-to on women
progress this into a mutual attraction, and when she is feeling the hot privates for your face, you must have another man who is superior at picking up women swoop in and steal her (gikoku and firis are masterfully at this professions)
أتمنى لكم التوفيق في سعيكم لمنطقة الصديق، محارب الروح العظيمة
you must first enter into a flirting friendship, using influences from puff the magic dragon's how-to on women
progress this into a mutual attraction, and when she is feeling the hot privates for your face, you must have another man who is superior at picking up women swoop in and steal her (gikoku and firis are masterfully at this professions)
أتمنى لكم التوفيق في سعيكم لمنطقة الصديق، محارب الروح العظيمة
Tsuyu
is wearing Queen's lace panties.
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You magnificent bastard. I don't know whether or not to punch you in the nuts, or kneel down and kiss them, as an act of disrespect and respect respectively.
Necromancer
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I suppose all I can say right now is that I agree with Gikoku. It might be hard to make conversation like that with her a lot of the time because of the circumstances that you've described, but I don't really have any better ideas. I do think that it's alright to make it clear that you want a friendship and to tell her you want to be her friend, though I'd probably do that after striking up a few conversations. And just make sure that you're very clear about your intentions. It will probably seem strange to her that you're interacting with her on this sort of level just to establish a platonic relationship rather than a romantic one, but if you explain it to her the same way you've explained it to us, it should turn out just fine.
Also, I have one last question about one of your guidelines.
Why is this not stopping you from attempting to establish a friendship with her? Wouldn't the friendship end when you move to a new location just like the romantic relationship would?
Also, I have one last question about one of your guidelines.
Why is this not stopping you from attempting to establish a friendship with her? Wouldn't the friendship end when you move to a new location just like the romantic relationship would?
Gikoku
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I agree with Necro here (and on a point he made earlier), I know you say it's purely platonic, but your descriptions of her and ideas of approach come off as borderline romantic if not romantic (which causes problems for your actual intentions) and it bothers me because you are currently in a relationship. So I really have to ask, is it truly necessary for you? I'm concerned for you man, because you're stressing over her, how to approach her, and then you're soon seeking new residence, granted you can still keep in touch via phone/internet, but the whole situation just feels sort of unnecessary/problematic (for lack of a better term) as opposed to opting for an acquaintance-level friendship with someone you're likely to not see everyday/possibly often.