So the other day we had a movie night dedicated to bad movies. Mostly based on IMDB ratings, we picked fairly random movies, not necessarily hoping to find any "so bad it's good" ones. As a creative bunch (or two people, really), we also had a minigame, where we made up alternate storylines and plot twists to give the movies a little more oomph.
On to the movies:
The Human Duplicators
To be honest, the 2.7 score on IMDB is rather deceptive as this movie turned out to be rather good. Not because it was a good bad movie, the other way around, actually, it was a bad good movie. It's 60's low budget special effects ain't nothing special and the acting's nothing spectacular. In general, it suffers from the usual "low budget movie without a brainy plot" syndrome - it's not grandiose enough to be dumb, nor is it clever enough to be dull. So what makes it good then? The plot isn't actually that bad, it just doesn't quite fit the "conquer the world" agenda as it doesn't feel plausible. Despite what I said, the acting is ok, especially considering the other three movies I saw that night. Things that were especially noteworthy: the cute blind woman and her amazing wardrobe (see-through blue pantyhose), the classic" from machine to man evolution" plotline, characters having to look up the word "android" from the dictionary, an early incarnation of Skynet.
We had two ideas for this movie. First, the entire thing was masterminded by the beautiful and seemingly innocent blind girl who was planning to use both the alien's and her relative's (the Doctor) technology to fashion herself another pair of eyes (and then perhaps some other augmentations). Second, the old man Doctor, said to be the girl's relative, is, in fact, an entirely different person, only impersonating as him, taking advantage of her blindness. Not exactly plot-relevant, but an interesting play on the movie's title.
The Room
Widely considered to be the worst movie ever made, The Room is simply in a category of it's own. It is indeed so bad and bizarre that most of the movie you're trying to figure out what's going on, or what the movie is even about. The acting is horrendous, character's motives are totally unclear, the pacing and timeline is so out of place it leaves you totally puzzled when something's even happening. Then there are the sex scenes (NSFW, boobs), which seem to have been the sole purpose of making the movie during it's first half. Well, they are kinda... awkward.
The Room has a strong cult following and it is no surprise why. It is a bad movie worth watching as you've probably never seen anything as weird as this. Make no mistake, it is not "so bad it's good", it's just bad. But it's an interesting kind of bad.
Track of the Moon Beast
Track of the Moon Beast was... extremely boring. There's nothing much to say about it. A cheap monster flick without an interesting plot, characters, story or anything, really.
Our alternate plot involved the main character's best friend being a hopeless womanizer, being incapable of getting any woman on its own. He then makes up elaborate plans, involving his more charming friends seducing women and after morphing them into hideous monsters, charging in, saving the day and being the heroic rebound guy.
Birdemic: Shock and Terror
I think people who call The Room the worst movie ever made, they haven't seen Birdemic. This is hands down, by far the most horrendous movie I have ever seen in my life... ever. Director James Nguyen, the self-proclaimed master of Romantic Thriller™ (yes, he has indeed trademarked the genre), is, according to various articles and interviews, totally serious about this movie. I would perhaps give it a little more credit if indeed it was a parody, though when I considered the possibility when watching, it did little to improve the experience. The acting is nonexistent, sound quality is unhealthy, CGI..., the plot... is a giant hole. The only good thing in Birdemic is Whitney Moore being hot (and in lingerie). She's so cute you can't be mad at her for taking part in this thing. The same can't be said about Alan "Woodblank" Bagh, though I guess I'd have to ask Tyloric if he even qualifies as cute.
Naturally, people's tastes differ and many posters in the IMDB boards thought the movie is super funny. I can't agree with this. To me, it flies well over the "so bad it's good" mark it wants to make you cry. It does invoke a lot of WTF moments and does make you laugh. However, there's a problem with this. Namely, it is still very hard to recommend Birdemic. It does have a very clear "quality" as the worst movie you've ever seen, I'm 95% sure of that and this would be a reason to watch it. After the one and a half excruciating hours are over, however, you wish you didn't.
Our own plot explained the whole thing so that the characters woke up one day in a deep delirium. Whether induced by drugs, physical trauma, mental illness or being brainwashed by Greenpeace (you'll get it if you see it), a psychosis would explain a lot: the jumpy sounds, the wacky birds, rush hour traffic and people casually walking on the beach during a supposed apocalypse. Characters simply imagine the entire birds and end of the world part, but everything they do, they do for real. For example: paying $100 per gallon of gasoline, looting a convenience store, kidnapping kids, shooting at nothing in the middle of the road, escaping a forest fire (that they had themselves unknowingly started perhaps?), eating seaweed, slicing a man's throat whose car had run out of gas in the middle of nowhere.
Post other horrible movies. Both the ones which end up good and the ones beyond redemption.
PS - I know it's a long post, but it's been quiet here lately.
On to the movies:
The Human Duplicators
To be honest, the 2.7 score on IMDB is rather deceptive as this movie turned out to be rather good. Not because it was a good bad movie, the other way around, actually, it was a bad good movie. It's 60's low budget special effects ain't nothing special and the acting's nothing spectacular. In general, it suffers from the usual "low budget movie without a brainy plot" syndrome - it's not grandiose enough to be dumb, nor is it clever enough to be dull. So what makes it good then? The plot isn't actually that bad, it just doesn't quite fit the "conquer the world" agenda as it doesn't feel plausible. Despite what I said, the acting is ok, especially considering the other three movies I saw that night. Things that were especially noteworthy: the cute blind woman and her amazing wardrobe (see-through blue pantyhose), the classic" from machine to man evolution" plotline, characters having to look up the word "android" from the dictionary, an early incarnation of Skynet.
We had two ideas for this movie. First, the entire thing was masterminded by the beautiful and seemingly innocent blind girl who was planning to use both the alien's and her relative's (the Doctor) technology to fashion herself another pair of eyes (and then perhaps some other augmentations). Second, the old man Doctor, said to be the girl's relative, is, in fact, an entirely different person, only impersonating as him, taking advantage of her blindness. Not exactly plot-relevant, but an interesting play on the movie's title.
The Room
Widely considered to be the worst movie ever made, The Room is simply in a category of it's own. It is indeed so bad and bizarre that most of the movie you're trying to figure out what's going on, or what the movie is even about. The acting is horrendous, character's motives are totally unclear, the pacing and timeline is so out of place it leaves you totally puzzled when something's even happening. Then there are the sex scenes (NSFW, boobs), which seem to have been the sole purpose of making the movie during it's first half. Well, they are kinda... awkward.
The Room has a strong cult following and it is no surprise why. It is a bad movie worth watching as you've probably never seen anything as weird as this. Make no mistake, it is not "so bad it's good", it's just bad. But it's an interesting kind of bad.
Track of the Moon Beast
Track of the Moon Beast was... extremely boring. There's nothing much to say about it. A cheap monster flick without an interesting plot, characters, story or anything, really.
Our alternate plot involved the main character's best friend being a hopeless womanizer, being incapable of getting any woman on its own. He then makes up elaborate plans, involving his more charming friends seducing women and after morphing them into hideous monsters, charging in, saving the day and being the heroic rebound guy.
Birdemic: Shock and Terror
I think people who call The Room the worst movie ever made, they haven't seen Birdemic. This is hands down, by far the most horrendous movie I have ever seen in my life... ever. Director James Nguyen, the self-proclaimed master of Romantic Thriller™ (yes, he has indeed trademarked the genre), is, according to various articles and interviews, totally serious about this movie. I would perhaps give it a little more credit if indeed it was a parody, though when I considered the possibility when watching, it did little to improve the experience. The acting is nonexistent, sound quality is unhealthy, CGI..., the plot... is a giant hole. The only good thing in Birdemic is Whitney Moore being hot (and in lingerie). She's so cute you can't be mad at her for taking part in this thing. The same can't be said about Alan "Woodblank" Bagh, though I guess I'd have to ask Tyloric if he even qualifies as cute.
Naturally, people's tastes differ and many posters in the IMDB boards thought the movie is super funny. I can't agree with this. To me, it flies well over the "so bad it's good" mark it wants to make you cry. It does invoke a lot of WTF moments and does make you laugh. However, there's a problem with this. Namely, it is still very hard to recommend Birdemic. It does have a very clear "quality" as the worst movie you've ever seen, I'm 95% sure of that and this would be a reason to watch it. After the one and a half excruciating hours are over, however, you wish you didn't.
Our own plot explained the whole thing so that the characters woke up one day in a deep delirium. Whether induced by drugs, physical trauma, mental illness or being brainwashed by Greenpeace (you'll get it if you see it), a psychosis would explain a lot: the jumpy sounds, the wacky birds, rush hour traffic and people casually walking on the beach during a supposed apocalypse. Characters simply imagine the entire birds and end of the world part, but everything they do, they do for real. For example: paying $100 per gallon of gasoline, looting a convenience store, kidnapping kids, shooting at nothing in the middle of the road, escaping a forest fire (that they had themselves unknowingly started perhaps?), eating seaweed, slicing a man's throat whose car had run out of gas in the middle of nowhere.
Post other horrible movies. Both the ones which end up good and the ones beyond redemption.
PS - I know it's a long post, but it's been quiet here lately.
