My anus is bleeding.

[Firis]

There are few things worse than putting your night on hold for a party, and you're just sitting there by the phone and waiting... and waiting... and waiting to hear what the plan is. You don't want to eat in case there will be copious amounts of food, you don't want to get started on anything because you hate being interrupted even for a good thing, you're just waiting.

Also my friend is caught in a situation, and I was wondering if you guys could help me with giving him advice: Basically what happened is he is watching a friend's house while they are gone, he leaves their house to go pick up his work clothes. While he is out he and his girlfriend get a bite to eat and then make plans to hang out, he needs to go check on his friend's dogs, so he goes down there, she goes with him, while they are there he decides that since he hasn't showered since he started house sitting (Four days in a man cave) he better shower before their date. Meanwhile the girl's parents decide to GPS her phone and find out she is basically a forty minute drive away (The house he is sitting is out in the country and semi-secluded) so they freak and drive down there, they knock on the door for apparently several minutes, the girl was downstairs in this huge house and didn't hear, my friend hears though and gets out of the shower, not expecting it to be her parents he comes downstairs and opens the door literally putting his shirt on while opening the door. Now we have several minutes of knocking on a house that is secluded, and him coming out half-naked and wet, his girlfriend shortly joins them upstairs and her hair is also wet as it was raining and her hair was in a bun... It totally looks like they did it, and there is no way he can get them to believe that story, it seems like a plot for a movie.

 

[DarkONI]

Parenting is a big subject, but if you don't trust your own kids then
who would you trust?

I'm sorry, but this subject is way beyond my childish thinking.

 

[Zjuggernaut]

So what if they did? They're not 12.. I hope.

 

[Gikoku]

It's not the end of the world.. they didn't actually catch them doing it and they didn't do it. If he were to tell me he was repairing a leaky shower head, but didn't want to get his shirt wet... I'd believe him. There's really not much you can do in a situation like that, especially when the parents are too stubborn to believe otherwise.

When all else fails, there's always the art of servile flattery.

 

[HeroOfCrapsalot]

He can always resort to.... murder. *muahahahahahahahahahahahaha*

 

[Arseface]

My motto is: "If you're old enough to house sit, you're old enough to make a baby."

Words to live by.

 

[Gikoku]

My motto is: "If you're old enough to house sit, you're old enough to make a baby."

Words to live by.

I don't know about that, I've house-sitted well below the age of consent...

 

[Arseface]

I don't know about that, I've house-sitted well below the age of consent...

I stand by the statement.

 

[mjmarin12]

Why not get the friend who's house it was to come and explain the situation. The parents already think the boyfriend is a scumbag and their daughter is a slut (no offense just trying to think like a parent) but maybe an outside source and the one technically responsible for this can help straighten the situation.

 

[Quistrix]

It's simple: They tell the truth and give their explanation. I doubt the parents will believe them either way, so they'll just have to deal with the consequences and learn from their mistake. S'all they can do, m'afraid.

Of course, as Giki said, charm goes a long way.

Also: Never have I clicked on a thread with such a title, and been more disappointed. Well played, Firis. Well played.

 

[Tsuyu]

*Reads title*

*Clicks thread*

*Reads content*

 

[TRA Rotid]

I was most curious because Firis has already had such a problem. "So what went wrong?" I thought. Apparently, nothing.

 

[HobbeBrain]

One time I was having a sleepover at a friends house.

My friend is one of those people who sleeps naked, dunno why, maybe he just can't afford pyjamas.

I am also pretty skinny so I need a belt to keep my trousers up, and I'd taken it off because we were watching a film and I couldn't get comfortable with it on because it was digging into me and stuff.

We ordered pizza.

A sex scene comes into the film.

The door knocks and it's the pizza guy. My friend says "Can you answer the door, I have a massive erection" so I do

His door is really stiff and won't open for some reason, I think it's just because it was cold. After about a minute, I couldn't open it, so I called him to do it, the pizza guy is waiting outside still, after one strong tug the door opens.

The pizza guy hands over pizza to a naked 15 year old and a (at the time) 14 year old whose beltless trousers pick the best moment to fall down.

Motto of the story: worse has happened.

Carry on.

 

[Angel]

Now that's an awesome story right there

 

[Firis]

Fine load of help you dicks are
Kidding aside thank you for the advice, I will attempt to help my bro.

 

[Necromancer]

the girl's parents decide to GPS her phone

That's just beyond f*cked up. I can't believe parents would do that without there being some extreme circumstances (like a kidnapping).

So Fries, what exactly are the parents doing about it?

 

[Firis]

So Fries, what exactly are the parents doing about it?

I wrote something long in response but it didn't post, so here is a quick summary: She is grounded for a bit, and he has lost their trust, and "Compromised" himself, he has the ability to win their trust back, but any more mistakes and he could be F.U.B.A.R.

 

[Arseface]

I wrote something long in response but it didn't post, so here is a quick summary: She is grounded for a bit, and he has lost their trust, and "Compromised" himself, he has the ability to win their trust back, but any more mistakes and he could be F.U.B.A.R.

How old are they?

 

[Firis]

18 and 16, guy being older.

 

[Tsuyu]

Then the parents need to GTFO.


srsly