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please help, i feel like a child for asking

cheezMcNASTY

cheezMcNASTY

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please help, i feel like a child for asking

help please fellow projectegoers.
i have never been so into a girl before...
for fear of using the word love...
i'm attracted to her every quality, and enjoy every second i spend with her. we've hung out several times, and i've gone and visited her at work (she works at a coffee shop with live music) for as long as an hour before.
now 2 days ago...oh how excited i was... we had a snow storm and i was stranded at her house with her friend and my friend. we didn't really get a chance to make it happen, though unfortunately because with that many people, privacy and discression are hard to have at the same time. i only got cuddling at most. :( but i enjoyed every second of it.
she had work, and the roads had cleared up a bit after we all spent the night, so she dropped me off at my friends house (which is near her work) and said she would try to stop by, but didn't. my friend was having a party, and i had more than enough to drink. all i could think about was how much i'd rather be at her house, but sadly my phone had died the night before. i borrowed my friends phone and started texting her.

after a few texts back and forth, i was full of drunken confidense i decided i should call her and tell her straight up...but it didn't go as planned. she was half asleep, and my friend walked into the room and started asking for his phone back. after i finished asking for 2 more minutes, i put the phone back to my ear and the line was dead. i missed what she said, and she'd hung up. i didn't get a chance to say what i wanted to, and i feel like an idiot. i texted her i was sorry i woke her up, gave my friend his phone back, and i haven't heard from her all day. i apologized again today after charging my phone, but it's strange because i know i'm over-obsessing and i can't help it.

right now we're both working every day this weekend... but i wanna take advantage of valentines day. i'm pretty sure i get off work before her so i want to try and bring her a card.

bottom line is, i'm a mess right now. if this doesn't work out i don't know what i'm going to do. any advice would be appreciated, i'll take anything i can get.
 
Re: please help, i feel like a child for asking

Seems like you might of spooked her a bit, best advice is to back off a little and give some breathing room, you like her but every relationship needs room. If you want to take a shot at Valentine day then send a single or bundle of flowers to where ever she works with a note saying what you need to say and see how its plays from there.

Best of luck to you mate.
 
Re: please help, i feel like a child for asking

Dont be to eager and pushy, women prefer the chase and thats half the fun. As Sabbath said, just back off a little and dont be so full on and dont obsess because if it doesnt go the way you want then you will be more upset than you need to be. Maybe you dont get the reaction you want straight away but you could still be close friends and maybe at some point her feelings will develop. These things take time, dont try and rush them. Send her maybe a small gesture and leave it at that and put the shoe on the other foot and let her come to you afterwards. If she doesnt then dont panic just be nice and friendly and go from there as friends. Nothing saying that it couldnt happen at some point down the road... have patience.
 
Re: please help, i feel like a child for asking

Whatever you do, do not make a valentines card out of your own skin. Never works.

Ok, my advice is done.
 
Re: please help, i feel like a child for asking

thanks guys! i've had many lonely hours of work to think about it and get a hold of myself. i'm gonna take it slow, and give her a surprise visit at work.
i'm just going to stay positive, and hope for the best.

+rep for the advice, it really was invaluable!
i'll let you guys know how it goes in this thread, should any of you care.
:D
 
Re: please help, i feel like a child for asking

i think i'm going to give vday a rest.
must come to terms that i may be a bachelor through vday, as i talked to her online after giving space. she's got plans (fingers crossed there's no relation to the holiday) so i'm gonna respect that and let my 50 cent card and present that i couldn't get in time... and just leave it be until i can hang out with her again... it's unfortunate but i think i may need a little more reality in my perception of the whole thing so i don't obsess as much.

gonna take a breather, and let her do some of the work (hopefully)
 
Re: please help, i feel like a child for asking

i'm such an idiot. i decided to be optimistic and try the valentine thing after all. i bought her a cheap and neutral card then tried desperately to get her a glass pipe for a present.
long story short, i didn't get the pipe until after i had visited.

and then this happened: she didn't text me back the entire day. i don't care who it is, that's an awful way to treat someone who bought you a gift (which she knows i did).

i'm done with this offensive behavior.
i hereby resolve not to call, chat, or text her. she's gotta do it herself.

am i doing the right thing? (if anyones still reading)
 
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