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Chuck Norris Fan
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The Chuck Norris fact!
Anyone know about The Legendary god Chuck Norris?
well this is some truth fact about him.
1: If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
2: There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
3: Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
4: Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
5: Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
6: When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris
7: Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
8: There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
9: Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
10: Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
11: Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
12: There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
.
13: When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
14: Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
15: Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
16: Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
17: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.[/FONT]
18: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.[/FONT]
19: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take **** from anybody.[/FONT]
20: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.[/FONT]
21: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris kicked Neo out of Zion , now Neo is "The Two"[/FONT]
22: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris' iPod came with a real charger instead of just a USB cord[/FONT]
23: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]China was once bordering the United States, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it all the way through the Earth.[/FONT]
24: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus’ birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.[/FONT]
25: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris once tried to wear glasses. The result was him seeing around the world to the point where he was looking at the back of his own head.[/FONT]
26: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.[/FONT]
27: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif] Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
[/FONT]
28: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris always has sex on the first date. Always.[/FONT]
29: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.[/FONT]
30: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.[/FONT]
31: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.[/FONT]
32: Son Goku Is the hidden son of Chuck Norris.
33: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris doesn't worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to.[/FONT]
34: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]If paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3 at the same time? Answer: Chuck Norris. [/FONT]
35: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris side only Chuck Norris know how to use the Chuck Norris side.[/FONT]
36: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.[/FONT]
37: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris’ roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye. [/FONT]
38: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]If Superman and The Flash were to race to the edge of space you know who would win? Chuck Norris.[/FONT]
39: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris eats transformer toys in vehicle mode and poos them out transformed into a robot.[/FONT]
40: Chuck Norris beat Fable The Lost Chapiter without using 1 experience point and without dying.
Ouff thats was few of em..... hope you like it =P
Anyone know about The Legendary god Chuck Norris?
well this is some truth fact about him.
1: If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
2: There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
3: Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
4: Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
5: Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
6: When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris
7: Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
8: There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
9: Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
10: Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
11: Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
12: There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
.
13: When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
14: Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
15: Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
16: Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
17: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.[/FONT]
18: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.[/FONT]
19: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take **** from anybody.[/FONT]
20: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.[/FONT]
21: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris kicked Neo out of Zion , now Neo is "The Two"[/FONT]
22: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris' iPod came with a real charger instead of just a USB cord[/FONT]
23: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]China was once bordering the United States, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it all the way through the Earth.[/FONT]
24: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus’ birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.[/FONT]
25: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris once tried to wear glasses. The result was him seeing around the world to the point where he was looking at the back of his own head.[/FONT]
26: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.[/FONT]
27: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif] Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
[/FONT]
28: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris always has sex on the first date. Always.[/FONT]
29: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.[/FONT]
30: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.[/FONT]
31: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.[/FONT]
32: Son Goku Is the hidden son of Chuck Norris.
33: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris doesn't worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to.[/FONT]
34: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]If paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3 at the same time? Answer: Chuck Norris. [/FONT]
35: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris side only Chuck Norris know how to use the Chuck Norris side.[/FONT]
36: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.[/FONT]
37: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris’ roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye. [/FONT]
38: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]If Superman and The Flash were to race to the edge of space you know who would win? Chuck Norris.[/FONT]
39: [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Chuck Norris eats transformer toys in vehicle mode and poos them out transformed into a robot.[/FONT]
40: Chuck Norris beat Fable The Lost Chapiter without using 1 experience point and without dying.
Ouff thats was few of em..... hope you like it =P