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CONGRATS!

I was there, I saw it... when the ooze slid off from it's face it grinned a toothy grin, and it's black within black eyes stared into my soul. "Tremble mortals, and despair, Ben Jr has entered this world."
 
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Hey Angel, I'll trade your baby for my cat.

Congratulations to mummy and daddy. And welcome to the world little man.
 
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Fankoo gaiz! Just got back from hostipull yesterday, absolutely fudging knackered and he was 10lb 4oz (about 4.7 kilos) so yeah, I'm so amazing it hurts. Literally, at this point. Cue the boring details:

Name: Joshua Rhys Mason Powell
13 days late, so big they had to keep us in overnight to check for diabetes (but he's fine); doesn't sleep, eats like a pig, cries A LOT, took 51 minutes to arrive from start to finish which is a new personal best for me. Once again I only got to have gas and air *grumble grumble* but he only took 5 pushes to get out during which I asked if I could possibly have an epidural only to be told "well he's kind of half out already so no" and...here's the awesome bit...I was watching 90210 while the whole thing was going on. Now that's classy. The cord was wrapped around his neck three times so he came out kind of black but no lasting damage - he's the ugliest thing you have ever seen though. And I mean PROPER ugly. Looks like a cross between Johnny Vegas and a sack of potatoes. Anywho, no nastiness to report in the way of stitches or surgery or whatever and this is definitely the last baby so my work here is done.

Oh and Hermit? Pay up and then you can have him as arranged. But just don't tell Steve. And you need to let Cheez have access every other Tuesday - it's a custody thing.
 
The cord was wrapped around his neck three times so he came out kind of black but no lasting damage

Hahaha that happened to me apparantly.

To reiterate: Your baby is going to turn out exactly like me. Enjoy!
 
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Oh and Hermit? Pay up and then you can have him as arranged. But just don't tell Steve. And you need to let Cheez have access every other Tuesday - it's a custody thing.

Wait what? Custody? You mean I can't eat it? Damn you, Angel damn you! There goes my chilli baby back ribs... :'(

At any rate we had a deal, so here take these year supply of happy meal vouchers and gimmeh teh baby! Now get back in the sack you wild breeding broodmother you.