My Hero

[Triz]

My Hero

On one sunny day in Oakvale, There was a boy named Blank. He woke up then forgot that he had a meeting with Cat and Bully. Cat was a girl who is very much loved by Oakvale, and Bully was the nice guy always helping people. Blank's real name is Jon, but people call him Blank because he was always forgeting things. Blank got dress and went to the graveyard as fast he cloud. There, he saw Cat and Bully. The smell of rose filled the air. The lumpy ground was hard to stand on. Cat, Bully, and Blank was going to make sure all of the roses got water and sunlight. Bully said,"Do you think we should be doing this?". Blank said,"Thats what I thought,I mean, peole would get mad if we messed with there stuff,". Cat thought the same, but didn't say anything. With that, they went to the sea to see if anything would wash up. As they went, they saw a ship coming in. On the ship was a hero looking figure. He had a sorwd on his back. The kids thought that it must be. Cat's red hair moved with the wind. Blank's head filled with thoughts of what it must be like to be a hero. Bully chough, then jump. This is what Bully does.... Anyways. The hero got off the boat to go greet the kids.END OF CHAPTER 1-THE KIDS

 

[Steve]

Re: My Hero

Not a bad first effort at all, Triz. Keep it up.

You may want to fix up some of the spelling and punctuation (not to mention HTML) errors that have snuck their way into your post, though.

 

[andythegill]

Re: My Hero

spelled a fare bit wrong like "Blank got dress and went" or "He had a sorwd on his back"

 

[Rhadiel]

Re: My Hero

pretty good Triz, but just make sure to spell check before u post it

 

[Triz]

Re: My Hero

Chapter 2- The Hero Of Spelling "Hello,". The hero said. The kids was happy that a hero really passed by Oakvale. Blank said,"Whats your name?". The hero said,"They call me Zane,or The Hero Of Spelling!". He looked at the kids with a pose look. He went on,"They call me The Hero Of Spelling because I make sure people spell right and I'm know using spells on my monsters. Zane is good though,". They kids start to smile as if it was funny,but they didn't laugh. Blank and Zane heard something like a BOOM. They ran to see what it was. Zane had a tight fit red suite on that didn't move when they ran.He had grayish hair. Cat and Bully didn't know what was going on,but they thought it gotta be something bad. "!#@$," Bully said."They gonna get us killed!". Cat had frose at the thought of something bad. Bully went on to catch up with Blank and Zane,and lift Cat there to die. END OF CHAPTER 2-THE HERO OF SPELLING

 

[andythegill]

Re: My Hero

I'm know using spells on my monsters. Zane is good though

whats wrong with that sentence

 

[droded]

Re: My Hero

Well by the time I read it, chapter one had some very improved English. +Rep for the effort.

 

[Triz]

Re: My Hero

Chapter 3-My Fight"GRRRRRRR" Bully,Blank,and Zane hread. Blank saw the monster by the graveyard. A Zoro Bat. A Zoro Bat is a huge bat the likes to eat people. Zane drew out his two sided sword. He hit the huge bat,but the sword sling backwards into Blank's hands. Blank knew that he had to kill the bat,so with a hit of the sword,killed the bat. Zane was shook at Blank. Bully only saw Blank killed the bat so he thought that Blank did all the work. "Oh my god! You killed it!! Come on,Cat might be in danger!" Bully turned to the sea and started running. Blank gave Zane his sword back,and said,"It would help me if you said I got the monster all by myself,". Zane was still in shook. Blank ran to the sea. After a while,Zane ran after Blank.END OF CHAPTER 3-MY FIGHT

 

[andythegill]

Re: My Hero

its shock not shook but dude i know your trying, no offense, please spell check it

 

[Triz]

Re: My Hero

Chapter 4-My Lover,My FriendAll three boys were at the sea when they saw another Zoro Bat. This time, Zane used a spell called,"Air Ride". He threw his sword in the air to the bat. The sword hit the bat and slice it in half. The sword came back to him like a broombrang. Where was Cat? Zane moved the bat using a spell called,"Sweep". The bat was swoop off the ground. Under the bat was something horrible. Blank mouth droup. Bully droup to his kness and cried. Zane was in shock. Soon, Cat's dad came down and had a panic attack because of what he saw."C-C-C-Cat....I-I-I-Is....D-D-D-D-D-D-Dead," Cat's dad said."You killed my sunshine....I'm gonna kill-,".He stop and cried and scream. Bully said,"I loved her. I really did. WHY!!". Blank didn't say anything. Then,he went to the dead body that was Cat,and felt for a pluse.END OF CHAPTER 4-MY LOVER,MY FRIEND

 

[Triz]

Re: My Hero

Chapter 5- Reborn Blank felt for the pulse. He felt a beat! She still alive! "Zane, Bully, she is alive!". Zane got Cat, and they went to Cat's house.****** 3 min.s later ******* Cat is awake. Everyone was calm now, only her father was still mad. "Why did you try to kill my Cat? She is my everything!". Zane was mad at the point of after saving her, he wants to blame him. Zane said,"What do you mean? I saved her!". Now Bully was mad. Then Blank. Then Cat. Bully chough,then jump. Then he said,"Blank did some of the work! You only killed one of the bats! I saw Blank,". Blank's eyes drew to Zane's. Zane rember what he had said. If he had said,no,I did most of the work. He only did a little bit. Then none of the things in the future wouldn't had happen. But he said,"Yes....he did. He killed one of the Zoro Bats,". Everyone was in shock. Just then,Bully said to Blank,"Go to the Hero's Guild and get some more heros to fight off the other Zoro Bats that are going to come. I read that Zoro Bats like to go the same rout every ten years. This must one of the routs. You and Zane should go. Blank, I think your mother is coming. Its my fault that Cat got hurt, I should have taken her with me,". Blank and Zane turn to see for Blank's mother, Blank has to go to the Hero's Guilt. Bully said,"Go and get revange for me! And, Cat... There is something I gotta tell you...I...Love...You..,". Cat's dad and Cat's mouth droup.END OF CHAPTER 5-REBORN

 

[Triz]

Re: My Hero

Chapter 6- Brave *** After talking to Blank's mother*** "Your not going to the Hero's Guild!". Blank's mother had red hair like Cat's. It went all diffrent ways when she shook her head. Her fave was always pinch. She smelled like a hobbe. Blank said,"I can fight! Zane is going with me too!". Zane was mad that he had to stop his own qust to be with this kid who forgets things. Blank forgot that Zane was The Hero of Spelling. Blank forgot how his mother smelled like. He forgets alot of things. The things Blank doesn't forget is that he likes fighting,girls.and chickens. He rembers fights like they happen to him, he never forgets girl's names, and he rembers the last time he had chicken. After awhile of talking to his mother they were on there way. Zane and Blank were about to the Hero's Guild. Before they went,they got supplies. Bully came to them right before they to Cuilous Gate. Bully chough,then jumped. He said,"Blank,Zane,get back for what they have done and be careful. Be brave Blank!". Then,they said ok and they went. END OF CHAPTER 6-BRAVE

 

[Shadow Knight]

Re: My Hero

qust=quest?

 

[Triz]

Re: My Hero

yea...sorry bout spelling...

 

[Shadow Knight]

Re: My Hero

Np but doesn't your browser put a red line under you misspelled words mine does thats how I avoid sounding like a 10 year old lol

 

[Triz]

Re: My Hero

ummmmm....I'm 10. lol. I'm 12 really.... and my compter doesn't do alot of things.... thats one of them...

 

[Shadow Knight]

Re: My Hero

Lol nice to meet you I'm actually 13 I'm sure firefox corrects words thats what i use go Download it asap! Firefox - Rediscover the Web
It tells you when it needs to update unlike microsoft's little piece-o-crap its a MUCH better browser!

 

[Triz]

Re: My Hero

Thanks!!!

 

[Shadow Knight]

Re: My Hero

I hope you like the browser and use its correcting abilitys :lol:
I joined here today and I have gotten 42 posts good for a day
I'm gonna turn in tonight and go to bed.

 

[Triz]

Re: My Hero

Chapter 7- Panic! At the Hero's Guild As soon as Zane and Blank arrived at the Hero's Guild, they saw the Guild-master fighting a Zoro Bat and some Hobbes. Zane was charging for a spell. Blank saw a sword. He picked it up, it was heavy than he thought. He went to kill the Zoro Bat. Zane used a spell called,"Hobbe Stop". All of the Hobbes stop. Blank hit the Zoro Bat. Just then, a newbie walked in and saw Blank fight the Zoro Bat. A few hits and the Zoro Bat was gone. The newbie started to scream with joy. Zane used a spell called,"Fire Ultima". It killed all of the Hobbes in a one hit. The Guild-master was shock at Blank. "Welcome to Hero's Guild,". END OF CHAPTER 7-PANIC! AT THE HERO'S GUILD