HobbeBrain
It's getting better, man!
- Joined
- Mar 16, 2010
- Messages
- 2,751
- Reaction score
- 689
- Points
- 285
- Age
- 27
The Tale of an Angry Hobbe
PLEASE POST A REPLY!!
Hi guys. I'm ed and I love writing fan fiction! This is my first story, hopefully it'll make you lol, or maybe rofl, or even better roflmao. Well, here goes:
THE TALE OF AN ANGRY HOBBE
Deep down in the damp, moist caves that ran deep below Darkwood, streams full of murly brown liquid (hang on, is that liquid? No, I think it's...oh, surely not...) trickled into a small pool. Next to this pool lay a chair. On this chair lay a cushion. Upon this cushion sat a duck. Upon that duck sat a very, very very angry Hobbe, whose name, incidentaly, was Dolphin. A little known fact about Dolphin was that he had an inny belly button, which was why he refused to wash infront of any other Hobbe. This was OK though, because Hobbes don't wash anyway.
Anywho, Dolphin was sitting on a duck that was on a cushion that was on a chair that lay next to a pool of suspicious brown 'liquid', and Dolphin was angry, because he hadn't been fed any marmalade.
"BRING ME MY MARMALADE THIS INSTANT!!" screamed Dolphin to a passing Hobbe, who incidentaly soiled himself. That Hobbe was called Ninja, but you didn't need to know that because he will never appear in this tale ever again. Angrier now, Dolphin ascreamed (I said ascreamed and I meant ascreamed) "MARMALADE!!!!!!!! MARMALADE!!!!!!MARMALADE!!!!!!!"
The news of this Marmalade-wanting soon spread far and wide across Albion, so it was only a matter of time till the Guild of Heroes sent their second best hero to sort out the situation (the first best was a bit too fat to fit through the cave entrance).
The Hero swaggered down to the Main Cave, honoured at the fact nobody wastrying to eat him like usual. At last he stood before Dolphin.
"Now, fine Hobbe, I do believe you are suffering from a lack of marmalade."
Dolphin had never heard such big words before in his life.
"You ain't got any marmalade." said the Hero.
"NO, I HAVEN'T GOT ANY MARMALADE, AND I NEED MY MARMALADE, AND I LIKE MARMALADE WHICH I WHY IS WANT TO HAVE SOME MARMALADE BECAUSE MARAMLADE IS NICE!!!!!!!" Replied Dolphin, caused several Hobbes to soil themselves, marking a world record for Most Hobbes to Defectate at a Single Occaision.
"Well, I do rather suggest we sort out this pickle, do you not agree?"
"Let's sort this out then." said the Hero. "I happen to have brought my very own jar of marmalade I am honoured to bestow unto you."
"Here is some marmalade." said the Hero.
Dolphin snatched up the jar and swallowed it in one huge gulp, which gave him indigestion.
"Do you like it?" asked the Hero.
There was no responce. Another Hobbe, called Daniel, prodded Dolphins arse, which was sure to awaken him. When that didn't work, Daniel played some jazz and showed Dolphin a picture of an otter. When this sparked nothing, there was only one conclusion.
"HE'S DEAD" Daniel concluded. "And there's no marmalade left!"
"But we NEED marmalade!"
"I use it for anal lubricant!"
"IT'S A WAY OF LIFE!!"
"My dear, friends" said the Hero "I'm sure this isn't such a big problem..."
However, the Hobbes were eyeing him hungrily, especially Ninja (yeah, that's right, I mentioned him again. I lied. Get over it). It took the Hero about 5 seconds to realise what was happening, and then the Hobbes were upon him, and he died (mysteriously of cancer, which killed him just before Ninja bit into his heart).
THE MORAL OF THIS STORY IS:
Never try to please a Hobbe because it will EAT YOUR ARSE OFF.
The End.
So, what do you guys think?
PLEASE POST A REPLY!!
Hi guys. I'm ed and I love writing fan fiction! This is my first story, hopefully it'll make you lol, or maybe rofl, or even better roflmao. Well, here goes:
THE TALE OF AN ANGRY HOBBE
Deep down in the damp, moist caves that ran deep below Darkwood, streams full of murly brown liquid (hang on, is that liquid? No, I think it's...oh, surely not...) trickled into a small pool. Next to this pool lay a chair. On this chair lay a cushion. Upon this cushion sat a duck. Upon that duck sat a very, very very angry Hobbe, whose name, incidentaly, was Dolphin. A little known fact about Dolphin was that he had an inny belly button, which was why he refused to wash infront of any other Hobbe. This was OK though, because Hobbes don't wash anyway.
Anywho, Dolphin was sitting on a duck that was on a cushion that was on a chair that lay next to a pool of suspicious brown 'liquid', and Dolphin was angry, because he hadn't been fed any marmalade.
"BRING ME MY MARMALADE THIS INSTANT!!" screamed Dolphin to a passing Hobbe, who incidentaly soiled himself. That Hobbe was called Ninja, but you didn't need to know that because he will never appear in this tale ever again. Angrier now, Dolphin ascreamed (I said ascreamed and I meant ascreamed) "MARMALADE!!!!!!!! MARMALADE!!!!!!MARMALADE!!!!!!!"
The news of this Marmalade-wanting soon spread far and wide across Albion, so it was only a matter of time till the Guild of Heroes sent their second best hero to sort out the situation (the first best was a bit too fat to fit through the cave entrance).
The Hero swaggered down to the Main Cave, honoured at the fact nobody wastrying to eat him like usual. At last he stood before Dolphin.
"Now, fine Hobbe, I do believe you are suffering from a lack of marmalade."
Dolphin had never heard such big words before in his life.
"You ain't got any marmalade." said the Hero.
"NO, I HAVEN'T GOT ANY MARMALADE, AND I NEED MY MARMALADE, AND I LIKE MARMALADE WHICH I WHY IS WANT TO HAVE SOME MARMALADE BECAUSE MARAMLADE IS NICE!!!!!!!" Replied Dolphin, caused several Hobbes to soil themselves, marking a world record for Most Hobbes to Defectate at a Single Occaision.
"Well, I do rather suggest we sort out this pickle, do you not agree?"
"Let's sort this out then." said the Hero. "I happen to have brought my very own jar of marmalade I am honoured to bestow unto you."
"Here is some marmalade." said the Hero.
Dolphin snatched up the jar and swallowed it in one huge gulp, which gave him indigestion.
"Do you like it?" asked the Hero.
There was no responce. Another Hobbe, called Daniel, prodded Dolphins arse, which was sure to awaken him. When that didn't work, Daniel played some jazz and showed Dolphin a picture of an otter. When this sparked nothing, there was only one conclusion.
"HE'S DEAD" Daniel concluded. "And there's no marmalade left!"
"But we NEED marmalade!"
"I use it for anal lubricant!"
"IT'S A WAY OF LIFE!!"
"My dear, friends" said the Hero "I'm sure this isn't such a big problem..."
However, the Hobbes were eyeing him hungrily, especially Ninja (yeah, that's right, I mentioned him again. I lied. Get over it). It took the Hero about 5 seconds to realise what was happening, and then the Hobbes were upon him, and he died (mysteriously of cancer, which killed him just before Ninja bit into his heart).
THE MORAL OF THIS STORY IS:
Never try to please a Hobbe because it will EAT YOUR ARSE OFF.
The End.
So, what do you guys think?