Civilians: Please Read

[HobbeBrain]

I also just think I should say I'm immortal.

Seriously, when I die I wake up a few minutes later.

I have been:
Shot 23,345 times.
Beheaded 78,695 times.
Electrocuted 424,263,057 times.
Beaten to death 3,456 times.
Eaten 294 times.
Given the Chair 43,664,203 times.
Drowned 968,533,843 times.
Pushed out of a helicopter 4,426 times.
Bailed out of a moving car 873 times.
Fallen off a cliff 67 times.
Suffocated 34,562 times
And crucified 953 times.

Overall, I have been killed 1,436,607,774 times.

As you can see, I'm not the most popular of people.

 

[El Mosqueton]

I also just think I should say I'm immortal.

Seriously, when I die I wake up a few minutes later.

I have been:
Shot 23,345 times.
Beheaded 78,695 times.
Electrocuted 424,263,057 times.
Beaten to death 3,456 times.
Eaten 294 times.
Given the Chair 43,664,203 times.
Drowned 968,533,843 times.
Pushed out of a helicopter 4,426 times.
Bailed out of a moving car 873 times.
Fallen off a cliff 67 times.
Suffocated 34,562 times
And crucified 953 times.

Overall, I have been killed 1,436,607,774 times.

As you can see, I'm not the most popular of people.

That's not being immortal you silly hobbe, to be immortal you have to not actually die. You're just... respawning?

 

[HobbeBrain]

That's not being immortal you silly hobbe, to be immortal you have to not actually die. You're just... respawning?

How about "Coming back to life"?

 

[El Mosqueton]

OK, let's do this: Respawning back to life.

 

[HobbeBrain]

OK, let's do this: Respawning back to life.

But respawning implies I re-appear in a different place.

 

[El Mosqueton]

But respawning implies I re-appear in a different place.

**** you Hobbe.

 

[HobbeBrain]

f*** you Hobbe.

 

[L0ki]

Hobbe respawns inside women.

 

[Hermit]

An Update on the Current Situation:

Many quarantine zones in the south have been overrun, and we have recieved reports that multiple infected have made it past the border set up between the south and north. If you live in the north area, keep an eye out for quarantine zones and make your way there immediatly. With your calm cooperation, this virus will be gone in no time.

 

[HobbeBrain]

Penis.

 

[Quistrix]

[grabs all the caek] [holds gun] This is how you prepare for a crisis.

 

[cheezMcNASTY]

 

[Fenrir]

There here! The zombies are in Texas. Killed my first zombie on friday with a J-blade, since then I have been so busy killing the undead that I forgot all about the internet and my promise to warn you all if they were really here. I live in a pretty secluded area so I should be able to hold out, body count is up to 12, most having been brought down by silenced .22 fire and I've only needed to resort to the shotgun once. I'm optimistic. Keep your weapons quiet fellas, you dont want to attract any more.

 

[HobbeBrain]

Or in the cases of people like me, six guns. No I will not tell you what all of them are, just my two favories, 1911 clone 45 pistol(which I have posted a picture of before) and a Mossberg 30-06 with all the bells and whisles.

So the Zombies aren't really the threat here...

 

[Sean]

Don't worry, guys.

I have infiltrated the CEDA Headquarters and eliminated all assets and set free the poor innocents that were being brutally tested on and kept in closed doors. It's okay, they just looked a little hungry but I think they will be ok.

 

[HobbeBrain]

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