A Coming of Age Tale
So, I was at the mall today, all by my lonesome. I had been at home all day and just wanted out of the house, ya know? So I figured I'd hit the mall, swing by Game Stop, walk over to the book store, and then grab some tea, all in the same place. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It first started going downhill when I ran into an ex-friend of mine. Why aren't we friends anymore? It's quite simple, really. When he found out I was gay, he just stopped talking to me. Period.
But I'm walking into the food court, mind set on tea, when he happens to be in the same shop. He walks over to me like we're all buddy buddy and, not wanting to be a douche bag, I try to politely excuse myself.
"Off to suck some ****?" He asks straight faced. I stared at him for a long moment, waiting to see if he would crack a smile, grin, raise a mother ****ing eyebrow, anything that might tell me has joking.
But, no, he was being serious.
So, I replied with: "Yeah. I'd invite you to come, but only men are allowed."
BAZING. The look on his face was priceless...
...until he decked me.
To their credit, mall security reacted surprisingly fast.
But now my nose is bleeding in my tea. No, he didn't break it, but mother **** did it hurt. Fun fact, though, he got thrown out of the mall.
But, yeah, blood in my tea. Blood on my shirt. Blood. On my white t-shirt.
First, the lady behind the counter gives me a free tea. I would have hugged her, but, you know. Blood.
Second, I grab napkins until the bleeding stops.
AND THEN. HOLY SH*T.
One of the most beautiful men I HAVE SEEN IN THE HISTORY OF EVER... offers me his over shirt.
I asked him out, point blank. I didn't know what I was thinking. I don't think I was, to be honest. It was the first time I'd ever asked anyone out. I never do, for fear of rejection, so I don't understand what the flying f*ck was going through my head.
He grinned, showing perfect teeth, and said...
"Sorry, I'm married."
I was about to stammer out an apology when he followed up with:
"But if it goes south, I'll keep you in mind." He gave me his MSN address.
A good day?
I F*CKING THINK SO.
So, I was at the mall today, all by my lonesome. I had been at home all day and just wanted out of the house, ya know? So I figured I'd hit the mall, swing by Game Stop, walk over to the book store, and then grab some tea, all in the same place. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It first started going downhill when I ran into an ex-friend of mine. Why aren't we friends anymore? It's quite simple, really. When he found out I was gay, he just stopped talking to me. Period.
But I'm walking into the food court, mind set on tea, when he happens to be in the same shop. He walks over to me like we're all buddy buddy and, not wanting to be a douche bag, I try to politely excuse myself.
"Off to suck some ****?" He asks straight faced. I stared at him for a long moment, waiting to see if he would crack a smile, grin, raise a mother ****ing eyebrow, anything that might tell me has joking.
But, no, he was being serious.
So, I replied with: "Yeah. I'd invite you to come, but only men are allowed."
BAZING. The look on his face was priceless...
...until he decked me.
To their credit, mall security reacted surprisingly fast.
But now my nose is bleeding in my tea. No, he didn't break it, but mother **** did it hurt. Fun fact, though, he got thrown out of the mall.
But, yeah, blood in my tea. Blood on my shirt. Blood. On my white t-shirt.
First, the lady behind the counter gives me a free tea. I would have hugged her, but, you know. Blood.
Second, I grab napkins until the bleeding stops.
AND THEN. HOLY SH*T.
One of the most beautiful men I HAVE SEEN IN THE HISTORY OF EVER... offers me his over shirt.
I asked him out, point blank. I didn't know what I was thinking. I don't think I was, to be honest. It was the first time I'd ever asked anyone out. I never do, for fear of rejection, so I don't understand what the flying f*ck was going through my head.
He grinned, showing perfect teeth, and said...
"Sorry, I'm married."
I was about to stammer out an apology when he followed up with:
"But if it goes south, I'll keep you in mind." He gave me his MSN address.
A good day?
I F*CKING THINK SO.
