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Holiday Tradions

Tyloric

Tyloric

Illogical Process of Elimination
Oct 23, 2008
2,865
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Texas
I want to discuss what everyone likes to do during the Holidays.

Now, before we start, please don't turn this in to a "there is no god, holidays suck, I'm so emo I **** bricks!" thread. Go else where. This thread is intended to be lighthearted.

ANYWAY
Holiday traditions, what are yours? I don't really have any, as everyone always travels to us and such so we normally don't even have to leave the house.
 
I usually go to my aunts hose xmas night and that's when we all open presents and have the big dinner. Then xmas day is just a day to relax.
 
I normally just spend Christmas with the family tbh. We try to travel during the christmas period so we don't get bored at home lol. This year we're going on holiday to the U.S of A, more specifically Florida. I'm going to Disney World ! Awwwwww yeah :P
 
Christmas in Scotland. Family+Whiskey=Perfection
 
I never do anything before christmas day, but on that day, here's the list of stuff I usually do:

1. Wake up
2. Open presents
3. Eat breakfast with my family
4. Use the sh*t that I got
5. Ditch my family to go hang out with friends and talk about and use the sh*t that we got
6. Come home and eat dinner with my family
7. Use the sh*t that I got some more
8. Go to sleep

Oh, I'm sorry. You thought this post was going to be interesting? My bad.
 
Well, this was what it was until now. Now we are just buying ourselves gifts. Ridiculous.

But what it used to be: Wake up early, wait for parents to get their asses up, open stockings (I LURV STOCKINGS), open presents, say thank you blah blah blah, use what I get.
 
I've yet had a Christmas with my wife because I'm usually deployed at this time of year, so I'm actually looking forward to this Christmas, cause I got that whole week off.

I work on New Years, though.

I'm actually excited to spend time with her on Christmas. I swear, she better make something delicious before I wake up, cause if there's nothing, I'm reporting into work. ;)

I'm clowning.
 
Family gets together, we eat, we watch a movie, exchange gifts, listen to my grandmother tell funny stories from her life. It's not like it used to be 10 years ago and back when many other relatives were still alive, but we still have a good time.
 
We used to wake up, open presents from each other. Then we'd head off to my aunt's or uncle's (and sometimes we'd host it) for my mums side of the family and have a laid back kind of lunch, then we'd head over to Grandma's house for a proper Christmas dinner.

Nowadays though things are less regular. Grandma had to sell her house and go live in a old folk's home, so we move Christmas dinner around a lot.
 
Christmas Eve I'll be running around town getting presents for people, as it's the day I get paid. I'll then end up in a pub pickling my liver.

I spend Christmas day with my family, making small talk, giving presents, getting presents, playing Elder Scrolls (dunno why, but playing ES games is inevitable on Christmas) then going out again.
 
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Well, I got kids so Christmas is probably the hell I inflicted on my parents at that age...

5.00am - Jessica storms into our bedroom telling us it's Christmas (like we didn't know) and demanding to know when breakfast is and which of us is responsible for eating and drinking Santa's goodies. We pretend we're dead.

5.30am - Jessica comes back in telling us to get up. We throw things at her until she leaves.

8.00am - Jake wakes up, shouting and rattling the bars to his cot until someone (usually me) drags their sorry backside out of bed and goes to get him up.

8.30am - stockings and breakfast, accompanied by me trying to hurry everyone up so we can get to church on time (we never make it, but this year might be different)

10.00am - the usual text messages from family stating the obvious and I send a mass-one back. Text message from church friends asking where we were. I ignore it.

12.00pm - Christmas lunch on disposable everythings because I hate washing up.

1.00pm - tree presents are opened, people pretend to be grateful, I clear up the paper

2.00pm - 4.30pm - a film, or similar, followed by a lot of me saying "go play with some of your new crap - I'm tired"

5.00pm - dinner which is usually stuff like party food and chocolate. Jake is now over tired and passes out on the floor. Jessica is coming down from a major sugar high and is a little biznatch to everyone.

7.00pm - all kids packed off to bed. Steve finally gets to go back on the computer and I pull the duvet over my head on the couch and sleep.

10.00pm - both kids wake up and start vomiting.

Awesome.
 
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Wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy
got my glasses- I'm out the door - I'm gonna hit this city
Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack
Cause when I leave for the night, I ain't coming back

I'm talking - pedicure on our toes, toes
Trying on all our clothes, clothes
Boys blowing up our phones, phones
Drop-toping, playing our favorite cds
Pulling up to the parties
Tryna get a little bit tipsy

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No- Oh- ooh- oh oh oh
Oh- ooh- oh oh oh

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No- Oh- ooh- oh oh oh
Oh- ooh- oh oh oh

Ain't got a care in world, but got plenty of beer
Ain't got no money in my pocket, but I'm already here
And Now, the dudes are lining up cause they hear we got swagger
But we kick 'em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger

I'm talking about - errbody getting crunk, crunk
Boys trying to touch my junk, junk
Gonna smack him if he getting too drunk, drunk
Now, now - we goin' til they kick us out, out
Or the police shut us down, down
Police shut us down, down
Po-po shut us -

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No- Oh- ooh- oh oh oh

Oh- ooh- oh oh oh Oh

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No- Oh- ooh- oh oh oh
Oh- ooh- oh oh oh oh

(DJ,) you build me up
You break me down
My heart, it pounds
Yeah, you got me
With my hands up
You got me now
You got that sound
Yea, you got me

(DJ,) you build me up
You break me down [adlibs]
My heart, it pounds
Yeah, you got me
With my hands up (Oh oh oh)
Put your hands up
Put your hands up

the party don't start until I walk in

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No- Oh Ooh oh oh oh oh
Oh Ooh oh oh oh oh

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No Oh Ooh oh oh oh oh
Oh Ooh oh oh oh oh
 
Angel said:
10.00pm - both kids wake up and start vomiting.
Click to expand...

I did that on christmas one time! :D Although, it was much later than 10:00, and I got puke all over my new gameboy. It kinda sucked.

The Tyrant Lord said:
Wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy
got my glasses- I'm out the door - I'm gonna hit this city
Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack
Cause when I leave for the night, I ain't coming back

I'm talking - pedicure on our toes, toes
Trying on all our clothes, clothes
Boys blowing up our phones, phones
Drop-toping, playing our favorite cds
Pulling up to the parties
Tryna get a little bit tipsy

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No- Oh- ooh- oh oh oh
Oh- ooh- oh oh oh

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No- Oh- ooh- oh oh oh
Oh- ooh- oh oh oh

Ain't got a care in world, but got plenty of beer
Ain't got no money in my pocket, but I'm already here
And Now, the dudes are lining up cause they hear we got swagger
But we kick 'em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger

I'm talking about - errbody getting crunk, crunk
Boys trying to touch my junk, junk
Gonna smack him if he getting too drunk, drunk
Now, now - we goin' til they kick us out, out
Or the police shut us down, down
Police shut us down, down
Po-po shut us -

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No- Oh- ooh- oh oh oh

Oh- ooh- oh oh oh Oh

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No- Oh- ooh- oh oh oh
Oh- ooh- oh oh oh oh

(DJ,) you build me up
You break me down
My heart, it pounds
Yeah, you got me
With my hands up
You got me now
You got that sound
Yea, you got me

(DJ,) you build me up
You break me down [adlibs]
My heart, it pounds
Yeah, you got me
With my hands up (Oh oh oh)
Put your hands up
Put your hands up

the party don't start until I walk in

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No- Oh Ooh oh oh oh oh
Oh Ooh oh oh oh oh

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, I'mma fight
'Til we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the clock
But the party don't stop

No Oh Ooh oh oh oh oh
Oh Ooh oh oh oh oh
Click to expand...

Wake up in the morning feeling like Winehouse. (Hey, what up girl?)
Grab my breezer, I'm out the door
I'm gonna be really loud,
Cuz I don't care who I **** off
Yeah, I'm a real big sinner.
Sometimes, I eat my dessert before my dinner.

I'm talking odd socks on my toes, toes
Taking off all my clothes, clothes
Feeling overexposed,
So, I put all of my clothes, uh, back on...

Flush before I wee, wee.
Get arrested daily, ly.
Tryin' to get a peek of some titties...

I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad.
Pucker up, kiss my butt,
Cuz I'm bloody f*cking nuts.
Hear the bass, skinny waist
Now let's copy Pokerface like,

Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh.

I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad.
Pucker up, kiss the nut,
Cuz it sells to be a slut.
Hear the bass, skinny waist
Now let's copy Pokerface like,

Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh.

I stay out till eleven when my curfew is ten.
"Goodnight, sweetie. Sleep well."
"Shut up, Mum! I'm on MSN!"
Now, the girls are lining up
Because we're pussy sailin'
But we punch 'em in the mouth if they're not Sarah Palin.

Talkin' 'bout doing things we'll regret, gret,
Menthol cigarette, rette
Butt plugs in his pet!
Woah, woah, woah...

Text sex on my Samsung,
Not telling Dad Mum rung, rung,
Have sex with Alexa Chung
By telling her I'm well hung.
(Erm, Erm, Erm I'm quite well hung.)

I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad.
Pucker up, kiss my butt,
Cuz I'm bloody f*cking nuts.
Hear the bass, skinny waist
Now let's copy Pokerface like,

Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh.

I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad.
Pucker up, kiss the nut,
Cuz it sells to be a slut.
Hear the bass, skinny waist
Now let's copy Pokerface like,

Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh.

This is the part where the rap breaks down,
This is the part where drums go POW,
This is the part where your balls sag down,
This is the part where you pants go brown,
This is the part where your dad goes out on a cold Christmas Eve to get some more milk but he never comes back because seventeen years later you find out he's had a whole freaking family with some Spanish bitch and he doesn't even know your f*cking name anymore!

Shut the f*ck up!

(Crying) I'm sorry...

I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad.
Pucker up, kiss my butt,
Cuz I'm bloody f*cking nuts.
Hear the bass, skinny waist
Now let's copy Pokerface like,

Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh.

I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad.
Pucker up, kiss the nut,
Cuz it sells to be a slut.
Hear the bass, skinny waist
Now let's copy Pokerface like
Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh.

(Woah, Woah, Woah, Woah, Woah, Woah)

Just Dance!

Bad Romance!

Now let's copy Pokerface like,

Woah oh Woah oh oh, Woah oh Woah oh oh.

WIN
 
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Angel said:
10.00pm - both kids wake up and start vomiting.
Awesome.
Click to expand...

Haha, excellent. Though I feel sorry for you and Steve.

I actually like christmas. Not because of the food, presents or the religious stuff going around. I just think it's nice.
We don't celebrate it much, though. Just a little (read "big") meal, some presents and hanging out with the family on Christmas Eve. And of course visiting my grandmother too.
 
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