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Red Dead Redemption - Notorious and a Dead Man

Zjuggernaut

Just plain talented!
Feb 7, 2009
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Swansea
Red Dead Redemption - Notorious and a Dead Man

Armadillo, New Austin.
1911.


Shaun was tied by his arms and legs as he was dragged through the centre of town. The townsfolk cheered and shouted as he was pulled up the stairs of the saloon.

"This is where you die, boy." Leigh laughed wickedly, as he strung him up over the balcony.

"You could have killed me back in Nosalida." Shaun whispered. "Why'd you stop?"

The Marshal laughed. "Oh no. I coulda killed you back in Nosalida," He smiled at Shaun "But what'd be the fun in that?"

Shaun looked down at the townsfolk. Chanting "quicker", "kill the bast*rd". He knew his outlaw days would come to an end. But not like this.

"Ladies and gentlemen of Armadillo!" Leigh stretched out his arms and grinned. "Today, we will witness the death of one of South Austin's most dangerous bandits!" The crowd jumped and cheered. Shaun's heart started to beat faster and faster. That may also have to do with the lack of blood in his system. "So, if you'll all sit back and enjoy the show." Leigh turned to his deputy, who handed him a sharp blade.

Shaun blanked out everything and closed his eyes. "This is it.." He thought. "This is where it ends.."

His concentration was blown away at the sound of gunfire. His eyes jolted open to witness The Marshal fall to the ground below and make a large wave of dust. The deputy quickly reached for his holster as his head hit the wooden wall behind, leaving a large stretched red mark.

The townsfolk made for nearby houses, stores, anywhere they could possibly hide. A strange man rode over on a horse. He was wearing a neckerchief and a brown hat, curved on one side. He pointed his gun up at Shaun and fired. The rope snapped. Shaun fell to the ground and screamed out in pain. The man picked him up and threw him over the back of his horse.

"Who -" Shaun murmured. "Who are you?"

"None of your goddamn business." The man replied quickly, smacking the side of his horse. "You just stay quiet."

Shaun's head fell forward as he slowly closed his eyes. They rode west.

Towards Gaptooth Ridge.

(To Be Continued if good feedback is received.)
 
Re: Red Dead Redemption - Notorious and a Dead Man

This is pretty good ZJugg :)
 
Re: Red Dead Redemption - Notorious and a Dead Man

Sean;390578 said:
This is pretty good ZJugg :)

Thank you. It'd probably be better if you played the game, I hope.

I'd like to carry it on but some criticism would be nice.
 
Re: Red Dead Redemption - Notorious and a Dead Man

That was really good. I would've liked the stranger to have a more heroic attitude though. Kind of like John after he saves someones life. Or maybe at least be silent when he's asked a question, it makes him more mysterious. He was kind of a jerk.

Great story though, continue it :)
 
Re: Red Dead Redemption - Notorious and a Dead Man

Evan52395;390617 said:
That was really good. I would've liked the stranger to have a more heroic attitude though. Kind of like John after he saves someones life. Or maybe at least be silent when he's asked a question, it makes him more mysterious. He was kind of a jerk.

Great story though, continue it :)

Touche.

I've already thought out the concept of the story. I think it'll be three or four parts.

Thank you for your criticism, I'll take it into consideration.
 
Re: Red Dead Redemption - Notorious and a Dead Man

If sexy was a word for describing writing yours would be beyond it :)
 
Re: Red Dead Redemption - Notorious and a Dead Man

Azer249;390724 said:
If sexy was a word for describing writing yours would be beyond it :)

Why thank you Aaron.

I'll start Part II sometime tomorrow, guys.
 
Re: Red Dead Redemption - Notorious and a Dead Man

Hurrrrry.
 
Re: Red Dead Redemption - Notorious and a Dead Man

I'm working on it.

I don't know whether I should create a new thread or not, or just post it all here.