Sephiroxas
Local Succubus
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Re: A Fable story told by me
Yeah no offence, but spell "your" correctly before telling someone their english isn't exaclty great. :ninja: :lol:
droded;46677 said:
Yeah no offence, but spell "your" correctly before telling someone their english isn't exaclty great. :ninja: :lol:
F
Fable_Fan005
Guest
Re: A Fable story told by me
^LOL.......and yes we all have established the fact i can't spell.
^LOL.......and yes we all have established the fact i can't spell.
Sephiroxas
Local Succubus
- Joined
- Sep 18, 2006
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- Age
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Re: A Fable story told by me
But we love you anyway.
But we love you anyway.
Angel
Down with this sort of thing
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Re: A Fable story told by me
*shrugs* so long as I can decipher your story, I'm happy
I only take issue with people who write solely in 1337 speak (le sigh) or have such bad grammar and spelling that it looks as though they have either created a new language or still haven't gotten out of the habit of writing phonetically.
You write fine - keep it up!
*shrugs* so long as I can decipher your story, I'm happy
I only take issue with people who write solely in 1337 speak (le sigh) or have such bad grammar and spelling that it looks as though they have either created a new language or still haven't gotten out of the habit of writing phonetically.
You write fine - keep it up!
Angel
Down with this sort of thing
- Joined
- Aug 13, 2006
- Messages
- 7,598
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Re: A Fable story told by me
It's not impossible to read though...and there are not many mistakes. I think people underestimate the number of established authors who still require proof readers before their work is published - the author's job is to get out the story - he/she can get someone else to do the checking over.
It's not impossible to read though...and there are not many mistakes. I think people underestimate the number of established authors who still require proof readers before their work is published - the author's job is to get out the story - he/she can get someone else to do the checking over.
D
darthlime101
Guest
Re: A Fable story told by me
That was AWESOME! Dude, you need to put more in. Gotta keep pace with all these other stories.
That was AWESOME! Dude, you need to put more in. Gotta keep pace with all these other stories.
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Fable_Fan005
Guest
Re: A Fable story told by me
And here it is the next chapter. (sry for the wait.)
[FONT="] My heart pounds as I race back to my house. The guards attempt to stop me; I open up my hand and shot a ball of fire out of my hand. The guards fly over in all directions. I arrive at my house to find guards lying all over the ground, and in the middle over the bodies stood Yotex. His body covered in the blood of the guards. His eyes glow red and his hand had claws. He looks up at me and his eyes stand to change back to their normal state, as do his hand. He walks toward me and strokes his hands through his hair.[/FONT]
[FONT="]“Well done Xugan, Well done.” I lower my head down is shame. “My boy no need to be ashamed of what you did, remember its all for her.” I look at him and grab him by his neck. “No, no more, She wouldn’t wont this!” At that moment 10 more people in black robes appear in a circle around me. They take out their swords. “But, Xugan you have already been excepted by your new brothers.” “What, what brothers?” “Why the Dark Brotherhood my new apprentice.” Then out of nowhere a pain in the back of my neck like a club had hit me. I lose all felling in my body and fall to the ground. “Now my boy sleep. My eyes start to fall black, as I see an old woman walking toward me in white robes…….[/FONT]
[FONT="] [/FONT]
[FONT="] “Wake up!” I start to turn in the cot I was sleeping in. “I Said wake up pile of….”[/FONT]
[FONT="]At that moment the door opens and Yotex walks in. “Now Brother Phoenix that’s not how me treat our family, is it?” The man looks down in shame and walks out the open door. “Xugan I’m glad your awake.” I stand up and look around me. It looks like i'm inside a bout. “Where am I?” “You are on the Shadow Stead, but that is not important you must see something Xugan.” I follow him to the deck of the bout. Looking at all the others on board. We reach the top of the bout, when it hits me we are out at see. “Yotex where are we?” “I told you already the mighty Shadow Stead.” “No where are we.” “Well it looks as if we are about we are 3 days away from the Valley Of Sleeping Dragons.” My eyes open wide and I yell “Why, why are you taking me there. “He says that’s why i’m taking you to see the captain, but first we must get you your gear.” I walk over to a chest with one Black robe and a pair of leather boots and gloves in it. I put on the clothing and ask, “Why did I have to put this on?” He just starts to talk away and motions me to follow…[/FONT]
[FONT="] [/FONT]
[FONT="] We make it to an all black door with a white handle. Yotex opens the door and walks inside, and I follow. There is someone sitting behind a desk at the end of the room. I walk and sit in the chair in front of it. I hear the door close and know Yotex has left the room. The hooded figure just stairs at me, for what seems like forever. I ask, “Why am I going to The Valley?” “Because Xugan you where the one that killed HIM” I think back to the king of Skorn’s death. “But, Why what do I need to do, why do you need Me.” the figure stands and rolls out a map of the world. “Xugan we are at the brink of war with Albion and the West needs help, we need a General.” I look at the very detailed map; the plans have all been made. “Why should I help you?” “Xugan, you know and I know that you will do it for HER, to bring he back.” “Who are you to tell me what I wont, what I need, you don’t even know me!” I pull the hood off of the figure and I fall back in amassment. “How, how are you still alive. “Xugan I will always be ‘alive’ I cannot die but yet you killed me. That make you the only being ever to truly kill a god.” I start to stand up and I ask, “Why haven’t you killed me yet?” “Because we both need something. I have her and you have the power to finish Albion.” “No I wont help you nothing,..Not even Alida is worth killing all those people.” He turns and opens a door behind him. “Well if she is not maybe your mother is?” I look up and see my mother bound in chains. I look at he and start to cry she is covered in blood. I stair at the ground and say “What must I do.”[/FONT]
And here it is the next chapter. (sry for the wait.)
[FONT="]START CHAPTER THREE[/FONT]
[FONT="] [/FONT]
[FONT="]DARK BROTHERHOOD[/FONT]
[FONT="] [/FONT]
[FONT="]“Well done Xugan, Well done.” I lower my head down is shame. “My boy no need to be ashamed of what you did, remember its all for her.” I look at him and grab him by his neck. “No, no more, She wouldn’t wont this!” At that moment 10 more people in black robes appear in a circle around me. They take out their swords. “But, Xugan you have already been excepted by your new brothers.” “What, what brothers?” “Why the Dark Brotherhood my new apprentice.” Then out of nowhere a pain in the back of my neck like a club had hit me. I lose all felling in my body and fall to the ground. “Now my boy sleep. My eyes start to fall black, as I see an old woman walking toward me in white robes…….[/FONT]
[FONT="] [/FONT]
[FONT="] “Wake up!” I start to turn in the cot I was sleeping in. “I Said wake up pile of….”[/FONT]
[FONT="]At that moment the door opens and Yotex walks in. “Now Brother Phoenix that’s not how me treat our family, is it?” The man looks down in shame and walks out the open door. “Xugan I’m glad your awake.” I stand up and look around me. It looks like i'm inside a bout. “Where am I?” “You are on the Shadow Stead, but that is not important you must see something Xugan.” I follow him to the deck of the bout. Looking at all the others on board. We reach the top of the bout, when it hits me we are out at see. “Yotex where are we?” “I told you already the mighty Shadow Stead.” “No where are we.” “Well it looks as if we are about we are 3 days away from the Valley Of Sleeping Dragons.” My eyes open wide and I yell “Why, why are you taking me there. “He says that’s why i’m taking you to see the captain, but first we must get you your gear.” I walk over to a chest with one Black robe and a pair of leather boots and gloves in it. I put on the clothing and ask, “Why did I have to put this on?” He just starts to talk away and motions me to follow…[/FONT]
[FONT="] [/FONT]
[FONT="] We make it to an all black door with a white handle. Yotex opens the door and walks inside, and I follow. There is someone sitting behind a desk at the end of the room. I walk and sit in the chair in front of it. I hear the door close and know Yotex has left the room. The hooded figure just stairs at me, for what seems like forever. I ask, “Why am I going to The Valley?” “Because Xugan you where the one that killed HIM” I think back to the king of Skorn’s death. “But, Why what do I need to do, why do you need Me.” the figure stands and rolls out a map of the world. “Xugan we are at the brink of war with Albion and the West needs help, we need a General.” I look at the very detailed map; the plans have all been made. “Why should I help you?” “Xugan, you know and I know that you will do it for HER, to bring he back.” “Who are you to tell me what I wont, what I need, you don’t even know me!” I pull the hood off of the figure and I fall back in amassment. “How, how are you still alive. “Xugan I will always be ‘alive’ I cannot die but yet you killed me. That make you the only being ever to truly kill a god.” I start to stand up and I ask, “Why haven’t you killed me yet?” “Because we both need something. I have her and you have the power to finish Albion.” “No I wont help you nothing,..Not even Alida is worth killing all those people.” He turns and opens a door behind him. “Well if she is not maybe your mother is?” I look up and see my mother bound in chains. I look at he and start to cry she is covered in blood. I stair at the ground and say “What must I do.”[/FONT]
[FONT="]END CHAPTER THREE[/FONT]
F
Fable_Fan005
Guest
Re: A Fable story told by me
Playing oblivion and i have to say sry for the crap Chapter i just let out. Right now im just trying to get to the good stuff.
Playing oblivion and i have to say sry for the crap Chapter i just let out. Right now im just trying to get to the good stuff.
H
herothearseface
Guest
Re: A Fable story told by me
The story starts to get good at a few points but then you do go off and say some just rediculous **** that makes not even a feeble attempt at some sort of a plausible reality. I give it S for Sucks! this is what your story sounds like... "one day.. i was eating a hotdog... and my hands got chopped off so i dropped the hotdog.. but it was okay cuz then I just picked it back up and started eating it again"
The story starts to get good at a few points but then you do go off and say some just rediculous **** that makes not even a feeble attempt at some sort of a plausible reality. I give it S for Sucks! this is what your story sounds like... "one day.. i was eating a hotdog... and my hands got chopped off so i dropped the hotdog.. but it was okay cuz then I just picked it back up and started eating it again"
S
souledge37
Guest
Re: A Fable story told by me
yeah this story is gold
yeah this story is gold
yeah cockmonger this story is sweet:realmad:Skorm's Son;23643 said:
dude i dont see his exact age but i was slinging sledge hammers when i was 9 ya bumForum-Troll;23644 said:
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herothearseface
Guest
Re: A Fable story told by me
Kiss a dick faggots. This story could never be as gay as you, but goddamn it's tryin!
Kiss a dick faggots. This story could never be as gay as you, but goddamn it's tryin!
H
Hexadecimal
Guest
Re: A Fable story told by me
well... that's certainly the most offensive thing I read all day...
was that absolutely neccessary?
there's no need to be insulting here, if you dislike something that much you can feel free to not read it...
herothearseface;79421 said:
well... that's certainly the most offensive thing I read all day...
was that absolutely neccessary?
there's no need to be insulting here, if you dislike something that much you can feel free to not read it...
A
Arcage
Guest
Re: A Fable story told by me
heheheh good storys
heheheh good storys