Oh God, Again?
- Thread starter Skotekal
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Re: Oh God, Again?
Therapy can be both helpful, but it also can be a load of crap. If you have a defense mechanism (like I did) You can say whatever it is the therapist wants to hear even if it's not how you feel. Just to get out of it. I mean who really wants to sit there and tell all your secrets to a stranger? Not me.
And meds don't always work. you have to find the right one that works for you. And even then some side affects to anti-depressants..Is depression....Worse depression. I used to take Lexapro. And it didn't help me at all. I didn't feel any differen't before or after taking the pills, so I stopped.
I truthfully think almost everyone on this earth has some sort of problem. Be it ADD, Depression, (so on) We're all crazy. It's just how we deal with it. That makes us who we are.
Therapy can be both helpful, but it also can be a load of crap. If you have a defense mechanism (like I did) You can say whatever it is the therapist wants to hear even if it's not how you feel. Just to get out of it. I mean who really wants to sit there and tell all your secrets to a stranger? Not me.
And meds don't always work. you have to find the right one that works for you. And even then some side affects to anti-depressants..Is depression....Worse depression. I used to take Lexapro. And it didn't help me at all. I didn't feel any differen't before or after taking the pills, so I stopped.
I truthfully think almost everyone on this earth has some sort of problem. Be it ADD, Depression, (so on) We're all crazy. It's just how we deal with it. That makes us who we are.
Re: Oh God, Again?
For $100 an hour, I sure as hell would want to get my money's worth. :noexpression:
§ephiroxa§;409003 said:Therapy can be both helpful, but it also can be a load of crap. If you have a defense mechanism (like I did) You can say whatever it is the therapist wants to hear even if it's not how you feel. Just to get out of it. I mean who really wants to sit there and tell all your secrets to a stranger? Not me.
For $100 an hour, I sure as hell would want to get my money's worth. :noexpression:
Re: Oh God, Again?
But who said it was paid for? I had a few years worth of mandatory therapy, and the first month helped, but when they keep asking and asking, and when there's nothing left to say and you're already better, it becomes a bit much. Therapy works for some, and for others it just plays on insecurities and makes things worse.
But who said it was paid for? I had a few years worth of mandatory therapy, and the first month helped, but when they keep asking and asking, and when there's nothing left to say and you're already better, it becomes a bit much. Therapy works for some, and for others it just plays on insecurities and makes things worse.
Re: Oh God, Again?
I was on Sertraline for two years - awful stuff. For some people it's awesome and does the job. For me, it just made me more angry, more depressed, more suicidal. I've seen different counsellors over the years and not all of them have done me any good, to be honest. Therapy isn't for everyone. Neither are pills. Once someone is seriously considering suicide, and I mean seriously (not that ridiculous "nobody loves me waaah!" psuedo-depressive state commonly associated with spoilt little teenagers), then it can be extremely difficult to get them out of that state. You can try all the threats, persuasion, cajoling, tough talking, sympathy you like but most likely won't help. Getting to the root of the problem is normally the only way to discern how to move forward with a suicidal person - but trying to simply "fix" them is not the answer. Listening to them is a start.
Regardless of whether it is selfish or unselfish to commit suicide, it doesn't change the fact that someone has died and those left behind are affected. I'm sorry for your loss.
I was on Sertraline for two years - awful stuff. For some people it's awesome and does the job. For me, it just made me more angry, more depressed, more suicidal. I've seen different counsellors over the years and not all of them have done me any good, to be honest. Therapy isn't for everyone. Neither are pills. Once someone is seriously considering suicide, and I mean seriously (not that ridiculous "nobody loves me waaah!" psuedo-depressive state commonly associated with spoilt little teenagers), then it can be extremely difficult to get them out of that state. You can try all the threats, persuasion, cajoling, tough talking, sympathy you like but most likely won't help. Getting to the root of the problem is normally the only way to discern how to move forward with a suicidal person - but trying to simply "fix" them is not the answer. Listening to them is a start.
Regardless of whether it is selfish or unselfish to commit suicide, it doesn't change the fact that someone has died and those left behind are affected. I'm sorry for your loss.
Re: Oh God, Again?
Well, today was the funeral, and all was fine and dandy, so far I was able to stay fairly okay, still pretty upset, but okay.
But for some reason, when we walked into the actual church, and may family took a bench, and I looked up and saw this little blue R/C truck. Now so far, I had basically very little memories of Greg anymore, but as soon as I saw this truck, it was like a kick back it time. I relived a memory that just punched me in the stomach. I was behind my uncle's couch, and my cousin Greg got up and showed me that same blue R/C truck. He absolutely loved these R/C trucks he made. But when I saw that truck, I just cried. I haven't cried in a long time, I can usually keep back tears, but this just hurt me so badly. Hell, its hard to keep back tears right now as I type this. It just hurt so much to see that truck. And then I looked over after I quickly wiped away the tears to keep my manly stature going, and I saw something I've never, EVER, seen in my life. My dad was crying. Not bawling his eyes out, but I could see him wiping away tears.
But everyone is still confused right now. I think my dad feels guilt, because just before he left off to go shoot himself, his wife and him got in a fight about him not being allowed to buy a new car, which he wanted one of those new mustangs, and the week before this my dad took Greg out for a drive in his 2010 Camaro, and apparently Greg was just so freakin' happy after that ride. But back onto it, he then grabbed his gun, told his wife she could have everything, and in an hour or so, she could have the truck too. When my uncle called to tell us this, we thought he was just blowing off steam, then a few hours later we got that... call.
Also, on assumptions of what happened, the best guess is that he took out his gun, got out of the truck, didn't close the door, and shot himself in the chin with a hunting rifle, and fell backwards into the truck. There is a hell of a mess in it, and it will cost his family about $3000 to clean it.
The weirdest thing of all is that just before he did it, he called his wife and told her to come meet him there, and she said no. We're wondering if he just wanted a talk, and if that would have made a difference, or if he was going to do a homicide/suicide.
****, I just don't know what to make of all this, and I'm probably all over the place right now. Sorry.
Also, what really ****es me off is during the whole thing: God was talked more about than Greg during the whole thing. ****ing preacher.
Well, today was the funeral, and all was fine and dandy, so far I was able to stay fairly okay, still pretty upset, but okay.
But for some reason, when we walked into the actual church, and may family took a bench, and I looked up and saw this little blue R/C truck. Now so far, I had basically very little memories of Greg anymore, but as soon as I saw this truck, it was like a kick back it time. I relived a memory that just punched me in the stomach. I was behind my uncle's couch, and my cousin Greg got up and showed me that same blue R/C truck. He absolutely loved these R/C trucks he made. But when I saw that truck, I just cried. I haven't cried in a long time, I can usually keep back tears, but this just hurt me so badly. Hell, its hard to keep back tears right now as I type this. It just hurt so much to see that truck. And then I looked over after I quickly wiped away the tears to keep my manly stature going, and I saw something I've never, EVER, seen in my life. My dad was crying. Not bawling his eyes out, but I could see him wiping away tears.
But everyone is still confused right now. I think my dad feels guilt, because just before he left off to go shoot himself, his wife and him got in a fight about him not being allowed to buy a new car, which he wanted one of those new mustangs, and the week before this my dad took Greg out for a drive in his 2010 Camaro, and apparently Greg was just so freakin' happy after that ride. But back onto it, he then grabbed his gun, told his wife she could have everything, and in an hour or so, she could have the truck too. When my uncle called to tell us this, we thought he was just blowing off steam, then a few hours later we got that... call.
Also, on assumptions of what happened, the best guess is that he took out his gun, got out of the truck, didn't close the door, and shot himself in the chin with a hunting rifle, and fell backwards into the truck. There is a hell of a mess in it, and it will cost his family about $3000 to clean it.
The weirdest thing of all is that just before he did it, he called his wife and told her to come meet him there, and she said no. We're wondering if he just wanted a talk, and if that would have made a difference, or if he was going to do a homicide/suicide.
****, I just don't know what to make of all this, and I'm probably all over the place right now. Sorry.
Also, what really ****es me off is during the whole thing: God was talked more about than Greg during the whole thing. ****ing preacher.
Re: Oh God, Again?
It's the job of the preacher, I'm afraid - they kind of have to do it. I've been to some funerals where the deceased are confirmed atheists but someone still hired a priest/vicar/whatever to do the service and they went on about God when we all knew it was a bit of a moot point at that stage. And that the deceased would be having a fit if they could hear it. My grandmother had a humanist funeral that her grandchildren (aside from me because I can't keep a straight face at funerals) were in charge of - apparently the funeral director wasn't overly pleased at such a loss in earnings but my gran was by no means Christian, so she would have hated a traditional religious funeral.
Glad the funeral is over with - I wouldn't recommend spending too much time thinking over the what ifs though; tends to screw a person up. Take everything as it comes, when it comes, and hopefully things will settle down enough soon for you to feel better
It's the job of the preacher, I'm afraid - they kind of have to do it. I've been to some funerals where the deceased are confirmed atheists but someone still hired a priest/vicar/whatever to do the service and they went on about God when we all knew it was a bit of a moot point at that stage. And that the deceased would be having a fit if they could hear it. My grandmother had a humanist funeral that her grandchildren (aside from me because I can't keep a straight face at funerals) were in charge of - apparently the funeral director wasn't overly pleased at such a loss in earnings but my gran was by no means Christian, so she would have hated a traditional religious funeral.
Glad the funeral is over with - I wouldn't recommend spending too much time thinking over the what ifs though; tends to screw a person up. Take everything as it comes, when it comes, and hopefully things will settle down enough soon for you to feel better
Re: Oh God, Again?
I feel for you man, I really do. I don't think there is a real satisfying way to do a funeral, its not what anyone wants no matter what. Its just not a pleasant thing to do. Don't worry about all the ifs, it wasn't your fault and there was likely nothing you could have done anyway. All the ifs have no bearing on what is.
I feel for you man, I really do. I don't think there is a real satisfying way to do a funeral, its not what anyone wants no matter what. Its just not a pleasant thing to do. Don't worry about all the ifs, it wasn't your fault and there was likely nothing you could have done anyway. All the ifs have no bearing on what is.
Re: Oh God, Again?
Thing that should be noted, on selfishness: The people who knew the victim will most likely get over it, whereas the victim self may even get more and more depressed, not killing him/her-self.
It depends on the weight on both of those to decide if it really is selfish.
If the person is really depressed, and no one seems to offer help (because they don't know, perhaps. While the person is also not sane enough ti think about help), I think it's not at all selfish to commit suicide. If however, the person knows what it will do to the others, or isn't willing to think about anything but him/her-self, than it is selfish indeed.
At last, if a person is really insanely depressed, and certain people know him/her (and the idea of killing him/her-self) but either can't or won't offer help just for the good of their lives, what is it? Is it selfish of that person to kill him/her-self, because it will upset the other people, or is it selfish of the other people, because they won't let him/her put him/her-self out of terrible misery?
If they love that person enough, they will do everything they can, to save that person. If they don't, their selfish, and the person has all right the end his/her life.
Thing that should be noted, on selfishness: The people who knew the victim will most likely get over it, whereas the victim self may even get more and more depressed, not killing him/her-self.
It depends on the weight on both of those to decide if it really is selfish.
If the person is really depressed, and no one seems to offer help (because they don't know, perhaps. While the person is also not sane enough ti think about help), I think it's not at all selfish to commit suicide. If however, the person knows what it will do to the others, or isn't willing to think about anything but him/her-self, than it is selfish indeed.
At last, if a person is really insanely depressed, and certain people know him/her (and the idea of killing him/her-self) but either can't or won't offer help just for the good of their lives, what is it? Is it selfish of that person to kill him/her-self, because it will upset the other people, or is it selfish of the other people, because they won't let him/her put him/her-self out of terrible misery?
If they love that person enough, they will do everything they can, to save that person. If they don't, their selfish, and the person has all right the end his/her life.